This topic is one I am quite passionate about, I’m sure my neighbours have overheard me loudly exclaiming my theory on eliminating the fear of failure with the innocence and bravery of a child-like mindset. I’m quite passionate about this and could probably talk about it for hours. So let’s jump in and see what you think when you get to the conclusion of this article.
Hey there, I’m Jenn Summers! I’m the owner of LivingABossLife.com & the Living A Boss Life Shop On Etsy. I’m so excited to have you here.
My goal is to help women reach the point where they feel truly confident, happy in their lives, mindful each day, and reaching their full potential.
In order to do this, I sell digital, printable self-help workbooks on Etsy, write a weekly newsletter and of course articles here on the blog!
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The fear of failure is draining physically, mentally and emotionally. Whether past or present we need to find a way to cope with this fear.
Would you be surprised if I told you, you once were fearless and could take on the world without a microsecond of hesitation?!!?
Well, it’s true as an infant and toddler our fear of failure was non existent!
Tackle the fear of failure, channel your child-like mentality!
As infants and toddlers, we are fearless, we fall down and we get back up. We do something wrong and we try again. We try a new way to get to the top of our couch cushion mountain. We in true essence learn from failure!
If we were not born with this fearlessness we may never learn to walk, run or even tie our shoelaces.
The innocence of childhood allows us to be brave and resilient.
When I think of bravery I often think of our twin daughter who faced many complications in her infancy. Surgery after surgery she would smile and laugh and try to play. Meanwhile, my fear was so consuming I was running on autopilot with adrenaline coursing through my veins. Sleep was non-existent and the fear of tomorrow was paralyzing.
If it were not for my daughter’s bravery and innocence I’m not sure I could have kept going. People always tell me how strong and resilient I am but the truth is our Little Miss Em is the strong one. She is my rock and she kept me going when I felt like I couldn’t. She invoked my mamma bear, the brave soul that I had lost within myself as I merged into adulthood.
Before having children I had become compliant and perhaps passive in my situations. I allowed myself to believe everything happened for a reason and that was the way of life. Although I still believe these things to some extent I also that advocacy and bravery by facing our fear of failure is essential.
In Childhood Our Support System Is Strong.
As babies we require someone to tend to our every need, we learn that when we cry someone will devote their time to us. We learn that we were born into a support system and that we are safe.
When we fall to the ground there is someone to help us back up, kiss our scraped knee, hold and rock us with soothing whispers in our ear.
As adults, we often find ourselves within toxic relationships. Sadly we don’t always see that we deserve better relationships or we misinterpret the constant criticism as someone looking out for us.
Fear Of Failure Is Learned
The whole point of this article is to show you how limiting beliefs develop by the world around us, by our experiences and by our failures and mistakes.
As a child, we have no limiting beliefs we are an open notebook waiting to be written. We have trust and strength and resilience but as we grow little seeds of doubt get dropped within the pages of our journey.
Some of these seeds may come from the people around you and influential words you hear all your life. For example “Money doesn’t grow on trees” or “money is the root of all evil,” which may affect your money mindset. Such simple almost obsolete things can change your perspective.
Heaven forbid you grew up in an abusive home, whether it be verbal, physical, sexual or mental abuse this can really change an entire person’s life and especially the beliefs that they hold within, about themselves.
A lot of my limiting beliefs came from my childhood. I always thought my life was normal and that everyone’s family behaved the way ours did. Some of the abuse I know was wrong but I also blamed myself because I was told it was my fault.
Those seeds of doubt over 17+ years crushed me and made me lose sight of my dreams and my hopes for too long. My confidence disintegrated and my life was on a downward path. I did not believe I deserved good things or that I was worthy of such. I had no idea that the relationships I was building were toxic ones, after all this was the life I grew up in and although I knew something wasn’t right, it took me well into adulthood to discover it.
Overcoming these challenges is my greatest accomplishment and that is why I am so dedicated to helping others build their confidence, eliminate limiting beliefs and meet their greatest goals. To think that I almost succumbed to the world I thought I should live in, the life that I should be following, that pushes me to want others to get out of that mindset too. You are not alone.
My Empowering Beliefs Workbook, Journal & Guide
Eliminate self-doubt and limiting beliefs with My Empowering Beliefs Workbook, Journal & Guide. Change your beliefs from negative to positive empowering beliefs.
There is more to this section we need to discuss, even if your home was wonderful and supportive and life was amazing we still have limiting beliefs that cast shadows in our minds. They come from all sorts of things and people.
- social media
- movies/ television
- music lyrics
- common quotes
- others experiences
- word of mouth etc.
For example: failing a chemistry pop quiz will cause us to fear failing again in the future when in reality it was a pop quiz, you can study next time, ask for help if you need it, try new ways of learning it, or maybe you were just having an off day.
Sometimes a person’s self-esteem is so damaged that they may think that one failed pop quiz in chemistry makes them horrible at all tests and allow their limiting beliefs to grow and flourish into a sinister fear that they will fail at every test in life. You may think that sounds extreme but you would be surprised how our minds can build a perception over the little things.
Stop Wasting Time on Fear Of Failure & Mistakes
We can’t spend time worrying about making mistakes or mistakes we made in the past.
We need to look at past mistakes as learning experiences and use them to be better the next time. Those mistakes or failures will help you find your success in the future.
As for future mistakes, they will help you find your future success too.
If we all did not do anything because we were afraid of a mistake or afraid of failure this world would be dark, cold and empty.
Quite Literally: think about where we would be if no one kept trying after failing once?
- Thomas Edison: 1000 fails until he successfully developed the light bulb
- J.K. Rowlings: Declined 12 times by publishers before her successful publications of Harry Potter
- Stephen King: 30 rejections on his famous hit Carrie
- See more people who faced rejections before success here.
Ever wonder how many tries it took to make fire? Failures lead to success and new discovers.
When you make a mistake, and we all do, figure out what caused the mistake, fix it, if possible, and learn what you can do to avoid it or improve the outcome next time.
We can not live in fear of making mistakes and failing at attempts or we will never learn new things and be able to create the life we want.
Some people believe we are born with what we have and that when things are too tough it is because we do not have the skills to do them. But let me tell you something, no one is born with the skills to do anything!
As babies we learn to walk, we learn to talk and we slowly begin to learn what we need to survive in this world. As we previously discussed we are born with no skills and no fear!
If you are ready to destroy your limiting beliefs I highly suggest you grab my self-help workbook My Empowering Beliefs and get started asap. If you need further support, book a call with me and let’s get your confidence and goals in order because you do have what it takes!
Stop The Fear Of Failure! Summon Your 2-Year-Old Mindset Now To Crush Your Goals!!
I hope you enjoyed this article and that any limiting beliefs and fear of failure you may be struggling with are looking more achievable to overcome.
Remember that failure is a good thing and it opens doors to new possibilities and new ways to do better.
Everyone faces rejection and failure, we all choose how we allow it to affect us. We are all strong enough to overcome these limiting beliefs, it may take a lot of work but it is possible.
Now go on and pull out your inner 2-year-old and start living a boss life with no fear of failure!