We have all heard that finding your passion, finding your purpose is the key to life. We need to find clarity and bam finding your passion will hit you in the face. You will instantly know that you should have been doing this the whole time! This is what you were meant to do.
Hell, I got stuck in a rut trying to find clarity and digging around in my head, confused and feeling overwhelmed and overthinking the shit out of everything. Searching and trying to find this epiphany that was magically going to fall upon me.
Let me tell you what I learnt… finding your passion is bull shit.
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Why finding your passion Is bull shit
I tell people all the time that you need to find your confidence, you need to find your clarity and you will (re)discover yourself, but let me make something perfectly clear, in no way do I believe this means finding your passion (purpose) will magically drop in your lap.
Yes, you need to get all of that great stuff to find yourself but keep reading to discover my hypothesis here.
What I learnt about finding my passion
I set out on this journey and I looked to mentors and I sought guidance from everyone and anyone I could find to ask or any info I could get my hands on to read about.
I wrote lists and I even begged God to tell me what the heck I was supposed to do with my life.
I felt like I was wasting my life and I felt like a failure.
My fixed mindset grew my self-doubt and my confidence became obsolete.
The talkative bubbly outgoing girl I once was became a hermit whose only voice disappeared.
I became what I thought of as shy, I became a troll living under a bridge scared to face the goats above. Now that just made me laugh, where the hell was that analogy when I needed it.
I did everything everyone thought I should do. Except for the right thing.
I remember feeling anxious and overwhelmed and angry.
A mentor I looked up to told me I was taking a turn in the wrong direction. I should slow down and take a small step and only focus on one thing and let the rest go.
What the hell did she know? I was a multi-passionate entrepreneur she had no right to tell me that.
To me, the words “slow down” were toxic and added fuel to my fire. I found myself doing all the things and taking on the world just to prove her wrong.
The words “focus on one thing” was bull shit, I’m a mom and own two businesses how the hell am I supposed to slow down? I have a passion for being busy, oh my gosh, was my passion to be busy?
Then a life coach for entrepreneurs told me the same damn thing and I thought she was nuts too. So I tossed her into the growing list of people to prove wrong too.
They were right and wrong
So here is the kicker, when I look back at what they said now, I know they were right and they were wrong. They told me I had to stop what I was doing and focus on one thing.
Well, in today’s world we wear many hats and we can’t just drop them all and focus on just one. Hell, I tried, I sold my first love and began my pivot. I felt like I had lost a part of myself, and I know now that I did. But I also know that I needed to take that leap and it was a stepping stone.
They were right about focus but they were wrong in their advice because I believe they truly didn’t understand the thought process behind it either.
Maybe they had heard it time and time again, maybe they thought it was great advice but didn’t understand it or maybe they just didn’t know how to explain it. Either way, the context in which they told me to stop what I was doing and focus on one thing was wrong.
When I knew finding your passion was bullshit
So, here I was listening to an audiobook and for the first time ever, I heard the truth about passion. This is my takeaway from it so take what you will and leave the rest behind.
We are looking for something in the external world around us that is going to give us this aha moment.
We think that it will fall into our laps and we will know we have found it because it will feel right.
We believe that there is something out there for everyone and not everyone gets the chance to find it and lives in regret and remorse that they let it get away, like a first love.
We are looking at the picture way too big!
Our passion is not the next promotion, our passion is not the brand new home or a new car, our passion is not the law degree hanging in layers of dust on our wall. Nope, it’s not. It is not an object at all.
Passion is inside of each and every one of us. That’s it.
It’s that fucking simple!
Your passion is in you, just like happiness, just like gratitude, just like all the other amazing feelings that empower you. Passion is not something to be found in your external surroundings but rather finding your passion is something that is internally in YOU.
Finding Your Passion (Purpose)
Slow down, yep there it is. Focus on one thing, mmhmm I said it.
Those two pieces of advice are gold. But they truly mean to slow down and look inside of you.
Allow yourself to be passionate in all that you do, when you allow this feeling to engulf you, you will find passion no matter what you do. You don’t need something to make you feel passionate, passion is a feeling that nothing external can give you.
When you focus on finding one thing, finding your passion (purpose) in you, you open the world outside.
You choose whether you are passionate about something. You can be passionate about everything you do and anything that you choose to do.
The most important thing to know is that it is your choice. You have to stop waiting for the perfect opportunity because it will never come if you do not open your mind to it!
Your purpose and your passion are your choices.
So yes slow down, and focus on one thing. Focus on you.
If you want to talk more about why I believe finding your passion (purpose) is bullshit, I’m always up for a chat, hit the little messenger icon and shoot me a message or reach me by email at jennsummers@livingabosslife.com
Be sure to check out all our mindset tips and strategies on the blog and in my Etsy shop!
Tale Care & Chat Soon;
Jenn Summers
Living A Boss Life
Love Your Guts! Take care & Chat soon,
Jenn Summers
Yes! I love the part where you say that passion is inside of you and it is not “found.” This is something that I struggled with and I always held off doing things that I am passionate about because I felt like I wasn’t ready or prepared to do it but I realized that it’s such a waste of time to wait for the perfect moment to start. The passion is already inside of me and I just need to chase my goals and find the confidence to do so. Thank you so for this post!
Exactly, Yasmin! It is so sad how so many people lose their chance to see their passion. I’m so glad you made this discovery I hope many others do too! Best of luck with all your future successes!